Wholesome Wear? More Like Bothersome Wear.

Every once in a while I catch an episode of the good ole fashioned show, 18 and Counting, on TLC. You know who they are, the Duggar family with 18 kids. E-I-G-H-T-E-E-N-kids. How does that mother do it for God's sake? I'm a complete nut job with two.

Last night I found myself imaging what it would be like to be one of those kids. Growing up, becoming a teenager and not being allowed to even be alone with the opposite sex. Going on dates with a chaperone. Having my very first kiss be the day of my wedding after hearing 'you may now kiss the bride'. Um... I wouldn't fit in so well in that family.

Not that I'm trampy or anything, but seriously! Seriously. Have you seen this show? I respect the fact they are so reserved and I'm sure they are great people, that's fine and dandy, but holy crap every single daughter has six feet of hair and they wear *gasp!* floor length denim skirts everywhere they go. The clothes alone would make me run away and never return.

Speaking of clothes... so at the end of the show, the camera crew were taping the eldest son and his new bride, Anna, while honeymooning in Myrtle Beach. They walked out of the beach house and headed toward a parasailing boat and right then my jaw dropped open. Wide open, cuz THIS was Anna's swimsuit.

Home girl is HAWT! And when I say hawt I mean hot. Literally. What girl can function on a beach in that ridiculous get up? And omg it comes with leggings?? And an undershirt? With sleeves? Who wears a zip up, scoop neck romper in the water? Who wears a zip up, scoop neck romper?!?!?! Is that even safe? Does it also come with two defibrillator paddles so your friends can shock you back to life after you die from a heat stroke?! And won't that beautifully fancy parachute material float up all over your face and suffocate you? Once, I tried to swim in an over sized shirt, and I barely made it out of the pool alive. I couldn't imagine treading water with all that shit around me, plus my six feet of hair working its way into my arm pits and all up around my neck. Anna, that's shit is dangerous! Go out and get yourself a cute two-piece bikini. If anything, it's the safer choice. And maybe then, your new husband will stop acting like he doesn't know you who you are when you go to the beach together.