Thursday, February 24, 2011

She's Got The Look

Never mind the shit that went on in Egypt, or the shit that's going on in Libya, or the terrible shit that's happening in your city as I type. Let's all go to sleep tonight thinking, not about death and destruction, or dishonesty and betrayal... but something a little more..... TOTALLY EFFING ADORABLE.

Her name is Heidi.

She's a possum.

Technically, she's an opossum, but that's weird to type and you'll sound stupid if you say it. She lives in a zoo in Germany and a local TV crew was shooting some footage of other animals when they caught a glimpse of 'lil Heidi and her slight ... um ... vision impairment. I don't care how ugly you are, if your eyes are crossed, you're still ugly, but you're also a little bit adorable.

She's all the rage in Germany, and everywhere else in the world, for that matter. Cuz hello, she's cross eyed and no one can look away at something so hideously adorable.

Here she is in all of her hideous glory -- choosing her pick for Best Actress winner at the Oscar's this weekend. Quite the celebrity, that 'lil Heidi.

Seeing that she's she's CROSS EYED and all, it's understandable how the poor thing accidentally wandered right past who she ended up choosing in the end.

Natalie Portman was her winning pick. Look how she's gazing fondly into Natalie's defect-free eyes. All jealous and shit.

You honestly can't tell me you wouldn't want to cuddle up with this little cross eyed beast. Look at her! She couldn't hurt a fly! No, literally, she couldn't hurt a fly! Get it?!  Her eyes. She sees two.

Oh never mind.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Sick And Tired Of Being Sick And Tired

I feel like I've spent the last six days inside of a cold, dark, germ filled cave. For a while there I thought I would never emerge, and simply die in my bed, suffering day after day with fevers, chills, headaches, rashes, fatigue and nausea. After three doctor visits, an allergic reaction to antibiotics, blood work and a possible case of mono, it turns out just one ugly hella-virus took up residence in my little body. And I have finally kicked its ass out. Be gone!

And thank God I'm better, because there's only so many HBO On Demand movies one can watch. I did splurge and buy Inception one afternoon, only to turn that shit off cuz it gave me way more of a headache than I already had, trying to figure out what the hell it was all about. My sick, pathetic little brain was too feverish and apparently wasn't able to handle any of the big words or fast movement.

I'm pretty sure I swallowed a years worth of ibuprofen caplets and if I never drink orange Gatorade again, it will be way too soon. I was that germy old lady, wearing her flowery house coat, holed up in her Kleenex littered room with the shades drawn, spooning with her remote and two prized tabby cats. Sounds hawt.

I know Terry is pleased I now have energy and am back to showering on a regular basis. Oh and the fact that I can now safely drive our kids' to school without the fear of me passing out behind the wheel, is a plus too. 

Monday, February 14, 2011

The Preschool Version Of An Anatomy Lesson

I'm not sure what part of this photo my eyes should focus upon...

1. The look on Grace's face --


2. The look on the dog's face --

Whatever your eyes focus upon, it's absolutely hilarious.

Monday, February 7, 2011

Just A Little Dusting, That's All We Need

It snowed twice in Austin when I was a kid. That I remember, at least. It was quite a rare experience.

Ava's only five and she's witnessed TX snow three times in her life. Lucky girl.

The great thing about Austin is it's 20 degrees with falling snow one day and two days later, it's 71 without a cloud in the sky. Sweet.

Emotionless smiles. Holding hands. Standing stick straight. CREEPY.

3 hoods. Too much?

The "Angel" portion of this picture ended when she realized wet snow and jeans don't mix.

I'm sure the East coast would laugh in my face.

You didn't think you'd actually get away with not seeing our cat.
In the snow. Surrounded by cute cat foot prints.

Come on, now.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Snow Day Y'all

It's been longer than the song of a whippoorwill since I've said hello to all you peeps.

What exactly is a whippoorwill and why does it need two P's, two O's and two L's?
Not only is the song of a whippoorwill long, but so is the word "whippoorwill" itself. It's fun to say. WHIPPOORWILL.

Is a whippoorwill a cross between a whippet dog and a wind mill? Or a flower shaped like a windmill? Something having to do with whippet I'm pretty sure.

I'll google it later. Or email Randy Travis to find out.


I thought I'd get a little small-talk out of the way, that way when I blog again tomorrow, you won't be all mad I've left you in the dark for nearly three months, and then out of the blue try to hook up again.
I'm not that kind of girl.

So you'll hear from me again tomorrow. Something with pictures or video or both because the SNOW STORM OF THE DECADE is about to slam smack dab into our house. A colossal two inches of snow is expected. This anticipated two inches has scared our city into forming crisis-management hotlines across the area  to assist in relaying pertinent safety and closure information to businesses and large companies. Oh, and also in preparation for this catastrophic storm, they've closed my daughters' school today and tomorrow.

All of this... well before any snow, rain, ice, sleet or strong wind has even occurred.

I'm laughing too.